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The Waldo Interview!
By WC

WC: Hello, Waldo. Before we ge... [Waldo interrupts]

Waldo: Look, man. My name is NOT Waldo! Some nitwit on the Internet sees a few pics of me wearing glasses and a beanie and decides; "Hey! Let's call that guy 'Waldo!". Well I'm sick of it, man. I mean come on. Waldo? What kinda dorky ass name is that? My girlfriend won't even sleep in the same bed as me anymore because she says she can't bring herself to cuddle with a "Waldo". Why couldn't that idiot have given me a cool name, like "BeanieMan", or "TheEnigma", or "Skippy"? Waldo has got to be the nerdiest name I have ever heard, and if you use it again, I'm walking out of here.

WC: Okay, calm down. I'm really sorry. So tell me--what is your real name?

???: It's Herbert, thank you very much.

WC: Herbert!? [laughing] And you thought "Waldo" was dorky?

Herbert: What the hell is that supposed to mean? For your information, I was named after my great-grandfather Herbert Louis Knapp--inventor of the knapsack. [lifts backpack into view to point out the oval "Knapp" logo embroidered on the front]

WC: Alright, Herbert it is... [Herbert interrupts]

Herbert: Nah. I'm just goofin' on ya, man. My name really is Waldo. [laughs] You need to lighten up, man.

WC: Can we please continue with the interview?

Waldo: Let's do it.

The Complete interview? Go to: Waldoconspiracy.com


------------------------------------------------------------

 
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